Month: June 2022

Time

/ Sue and Frank D'Elia / 1 Comment

When you are both working, and raising three kids, time is a very valuable commodity that you never seem to have enough of! But when you’re both retired, and your time is your own, it’s something that you have the option of using as you choose. Be it to read a book, binge watch a show on Netflix that you’ve wanted to see, or even to just sit on our front porch in the summer, and watch the drama and comedy of Pennlyn Place transpire, there’s time to do it all! Many retired folks say that they’re always so busy, they don’t know how they got things done when they were working, but we all know that is life. The job grows to fit the time allotted, and face it, there is more of that when you’re retired! That gift of time is part of every area of your retired life, and Susie and I love that we have it when we travel!

Ever since I retired in 2016, that diabolical stretch of Interstate 95 from the Delaware Memorial Bridge, to the city of Richmond, Virginia has been a part of our travels. On our our yearly trips down to the Sunshine State to enjoy a bit of summer in the winter and to now see our son Kenny and his husband Chris in St. Petersburg, it’s been there. The multiple times a year we head down to North Carolina to visit with our Son Bill, his wife Lori and our three Grandkids, 8 year old Layla, 6 year old Henry and 3 year old Annabelle, it’s been a part of our travels. That stretch of I-95 has been part of the beginning and end of every trip south out of Ocean City, and has become very familiar and also very hated!

The question always is not IF you’ll run into traffic, but rather WHERE and for HOW LONG? Will your travel schedule coordinate so that you get the EasyPass Express Lanes in Virginia going in your direction? Will I-95 or the Interstates that go around the big cities be your better choice? Where is the latest construction (because there has always been, and probably always will be, construction on I-95) that will affect your travel located? Will the way too many morons who drive badly cause a horrific accident that will shut the road you’re on down? All of these, and more, are valid questions that will affect your travel when driving this over-crowded corridor.

The absolute worst we’ve had, and the proverbial “straw that broke the camel’s back”, was a year ago, when we had Layla and Henry in the back seat of the CR-V, and we were driving down to Lori and Bill’s Lake House after having our two oldest Grandkids with us for a week in Ocean City. Their Lake house is just off I-95, shortly after you cross the border from Virginia into North Carolina, and should have taken us 6 to 7 hours at the worst. It took us closer to 10 hours, and not only did we crawl along in bumper to bumper traffic on I-95, but on several occasions the GPS routed us off I-95 to other roads where we also crawled in bumper to bumper traffic! There had to be a better way!

And luckily there was! Our son-in-law Mike’s Maryland living brother-in-law Gabe, suggested that we try US 301, which runs parallel to I-95 but to the east. We’d been routed off I-95 once onto 301 by the GPS several years ago, but until this fateful trip with Layla and Henry, had never really thought of it as a viable alternate. We’ve now done it several times and love it! When we went down to see the North Carolina Family back in May we took it and greatly appreciated the ease of the trip. When we went back to NC a couple of weeks ago, we were able to figure out how to get on 301 just after the Delaware Memorial Bridge heading south. Thanks to a conversation I had with our neighbor Meade just before we left on that trip, he pointed out that we could pick up US 301 off of Interstate 295 that runs around Richmond – they discovered that thanks to the GPS routing them off I-95 recently coming back from Florida. Doing a little old fashioned map work (remember maps), we discovered that we could get from I-85 (which we take to Lori and Bill’s in Wake Forest) to I-295 and totally avoid I-95!

Now, you may ask, “but is it as fast as going on I-95?” Well, if I-95 is running well, with no traffic, the answer is no. But realize that I-95, running through the Washington, DC corridor, is hardly ever running well with no traffic, and if you end up going the opposite way the Express Lanes in Virginia are running, it’s even worse. So the real world difference is often negligible, but either way, remember, we’ve got time! US 301 is a nice drive, with beautiful scenery,

You also get to experience some wonderful local places along the way, like Horne’s Restaurant in Port Royal, Virginia! We stopped on our way back up from North Carolina, had a late lunch (really the only meal we needed that day) consisting of a couple of great cheeseburgers, and two of the best milkshakes we’ve had since we were kids! Take a look and see if you don’t start salivating just looking at these pictures!

Oh, and if you’re interested in experimenting with US 301, here’s the directions we wrote up for us. It obviously starts and ends in Ocean City, but can also be used if you’re following I-95 or I-295 to the Delaware Memorial Bridge! Enjoy, if like us, time is on your side!

Directions to use US Rt. 301 rather than I-95 heading south of Washington, DC

1 – Atlantic City Expressway (ACE turns into Rt. 42)/ Rt. 42 to Exit 9B (Through Runnemede) and follow signs for the NJ Turnpike towards Delaware Memorial Bridge
2 -As you go over the bridge, stay to the right and exit at Rt. 13 South
3 – Take Rt. 13 to US 1 to US 301 South
4 – Route 50 will join 301 and continue on 301/50 to and over the Bay Bridge
5 – Continue on US 301 South (US 50 splits off)
6 – Around Bowling Green, Virginia, be careful to follow signs for US 301 South or
you will end up on 207 and head straight to I-95
7 – Continue on US 301 South to I-295 South
8 – Exit at 9B to Route 36 towards Petersburg.
9 – Follow signs for I-85

Finding An Old Friend

/ Sue and Frank D'Elia / Leave a comment

Ten years ago, when Billy and Lori got married, Susie and Krissi, in preparation for the wedding had a manicure and a pedicure. They didn’t know it then, but that was the beginning of a tradition of long standing in our lives that came to be called “Nail Night!”

Late afternoon, every other Wednesday after work, my two ladies would go to see Kim at Best Nails on Second Street in Mineola and have their nails done. This continued even after we’d sold the Mineola house and made Ocean City our permanent home. When it started, Krissi was working in a cardiologist’s office by the train station in Mineola and living home. It continued as she still worked and went to CW Post for her Master’s of Public Administration degree. It was still a thing when she stopped living at home, and moved to Astoria, and she commuted via the Long Island Rail Road after she got her MPA, and started working at Weill Cornell Medical Center in Manhattan.

It just so happened that separated from Best Nails by an alley, was the St. James Restaurant. While Mom and Krissi went and had their nails done, Dad held down a seat at the St. James’s Bar and waited for the girls. When they were done, we’d all have a drink at the bar, and then get a table in the restaurant and Dad would buy dinner. In fact, the St. James and Nail Night was the place we first met Michael shortly after he and Krissi started dating (she actually left him alone with me that first night), and for the rest of the time, every Nail Night, Mike and I joined the bar crowd at St. James waiting for our girls to show!

And quite a crowd it was! There were Doctors and other staff from Winthrop hospital just down the street, there were folks stopping for a shot or two on their way home from the train station, there was Ed who was a local Judge, and as Mineola is the seat of the Nassau County Government, there were lawyers, like Glenn the real estate lawyer, who actually handled the selling of our Mineola house for us! It was an interesting mix of folks who lived and worked in the neighborhood, with lots of regulars. It was a great location, and a good bar, but the real reason that these folks gathered at the bar of the St. James was the man behind the bar, Dennis Sweeney!

Dennis had been a commodity trader on Wall Street, who just had enough. His brother owned a bar and restaurant, and Dennis had done his fair share of time behind the bar, so he knew his way around. As he told us, it was a better life, with none of the pressure and the BS of his former life. I know we were very happy he made that decision, as were the rest of the St. James regulars! When Krissi worked at that local Doctor’s office next to the Mineola Train Station, she and her co-workers would often stop in, as did her Mom and Dad on days other than Nail Night, sometimes just for a drink with Dennis! Dennis was the father of two daughters, and we knew that he would watch out for Krissi, and in fact, when Mike started hanging around with us, Dennis gave Krissi a thumbs up on her new boyfriend!

Unfortunately, after years of having the same owner, new owners bought the St. James, and things started changing. Menu items that had been popular for years were re-worked, often times missing the mark in the opinion of regulars. The new owners wanted a new “vibe” and started to mess with personnel and the atmosphere. Gradually, the place felt less like Cheers and more like a sleazy sports bar, with too many TVs and too loud music! If their intention was to chase away the regulars, they were doing a good job!

Eventually, our Nail Nights ended, as we spent more and more of our time in OC and had less and less desire to be on Long Island. Eventually we heard that Dennis had less and less desire to be behind the bar at the St. James, and he moved on. We were sad, but totally understood! The last time we were in the St. James was 3 years ago on the weekend that Krissi and Mike got married. We were doing the rounds of Mineola, and in an effort to re-create those early Nail Nights with Mike, we went back to St. James for a drink. We found that without Dennis behind the bar, the bar that you had trouble finding a seat at back in the day, was now deserted! (Don’t get me started on why people buy a popular restaurant/bar and then change things and drive away the regulars!)

So turn the clock forward to the end of May, when we ran into a former neighbor who had been a fill-in bartender at the St. James. Turns out he knew that Dennis had moved on to Leo’s in Garden City, the next town south of Mineola and just blocks away from the St, James. With this new information, Susie and I resolved to stop in and see Dennis the next time we were on Long Island, and we did exactly that!

We got two seats at the end of the bar, and there was Dennis at the other end. As he walked towards us, he realized it was us, put a big smile on his face, and we had a wonderful reunion! We talked about our respective families and what was happening in everybody’s lives, and of course, we had two Grey Gooses Vodkas…shaken, cold, served up with a twist, with the marinated ice on the side! It was great to see him again, and reconnect with an old friend! Susie and I love the relationships we have in life with bartenders, waitresses, and waiters, and we were very happy to once again see this man, who we’d literary spent hours with over the years! As always, it’s the people that make a place special, at least that’s what we think!

Time to Say Goodbye? Or not yet??

/ Sue and Frank D'Elia / Leave a comment

Downstairs in the garage at 854 Pennlyn Place in Ocean City, there is a red Ford Mustang convertible, that has been a member of our family since March 31, 2000.  In fact, on March 31st of last year, on the occasion of her 21st birthday, I wrote a blog entitled A Member of the Family, that detailed our relationship, now in its 23rd summer of our family with this car.  Here’s a link to that blog in case you’re interested. https://rnewadventures.com/2021/03/31/a-member-of-the-family/

She started back in 2000 as my “MID-LIFE CRISIS” car, and has morphed into my “RETIREMENT” car.  When we took delivery of her, there were 3 teenagers in our family, and indeed the first accident the Mustang was in was with Krissi at the wheel.  In those days, she went to the train station daily, out to dinner and church, and even on trips, like our 2 weeks in the summer to Ocean City!  When she moved to Ocean City full time, and became a New Jersey resident, her life got easier.  Now she was our fun second car, and many of her days were spent in the garage or out for Sunday drives.  She is strictly a summer car at this point in her life, spending the winters tucked into the garage with gas stabilizer in her tank, and a trickle charger on her battery.  Now that she’s in her 22nd year, she is entitled to slow down a bit and to be pampered. In fact, in the most recent year, since her servicing in May of 2021, she traveled less than 1,000 miles!  I guess for a 22 year old car to have just 91,000 miles on the odometer shows how her life has slowed down in recent years.

Every spring, we wait for the weather to get better and for some “Top Down Days” so that we can enjoy this old girl!  A couple of weekends ago, we thought it was a perfect night to take the Mustang down the island to Captain Bob’s on 55th Street, where we were meeting some neighbors on Susie’s Birthday!  We enjoyed the drive down there in the early evening with the top down, and were happy we’d decided to use the Mustang, rather than the new Honda CR-V.  However, all that changed several hours later as we headed north on the island towards our home!  

We had a lot of fun that night with Bob and Karen, Chris and Denise, and our next door neighbor Doc. They all had presents for Susie and sang Happy Birthday to end the meal.  As we said goodbye to all and headed out, we decided that since it had gotten a little colder and damp, we’d leave the top up on the way home.  We were stopped at a red light about 4 or 5 blocks from the restaurant when our night suddenly changed!  The light turned green, I stepped on the gas, and suddenly we thought there was a motorcycle in the car with us!  Once I realized the noise was us, I knew that I’d blown out part of the exhaust system, and that could be expensive!  We limped the rest of the way home, not wanting to give her too much gas to keep the noise at a minimum, and tucked her back in the garage.  You know how life is…it’s always something!

As I’ve said, the Mustang is a fun second car, but not something that we need to get through life, and at this point, we’ve pretty much decided that the idea of dumping a lot of money into her to keep her on the road is not something we want to do.  Because of this, for the past couple of years, when she goes to the garage to get her yearly service, I tell the guys to call me if she needs anything beyond her normal servicing, because there will be an amount we are not interested to spend to keep her around.  So that was the basis on which I dropped her off at Best Tire on Asbury Avenue, and Susie and I waited for their findings.  The next afternoon, Kyle called and told me that she had a cracked Y Pipe coming out of the engine, and that there were 4 catalytic convertors on that pipe, and that he was sure I didn’t want to go ahead with replacing the part which cost $2600!  Sounded like it was the end of the road for the 2000 Mustang, but then he gave us a ray of hope.  He said that he’d give me a card for a guy in Northfield who did muffler repair, and he bet that he could weld the pipe for a couple of hundred dollars!

So we picked up the Mustang and drove to Bargain Brakes and Mufflers on Tilton Road, and I explained to the guy there what my issue was, and who had sent me.  He took my keys and told me they’d take a look the next day.  About 2 the next afternoon, my cell phone rang and caller ID said Budget Muffler.  I answered and the gentleman said, “We took the pipe down, welded it and it still leaked.  So we took it down again, and welded it in another place, and it works fine now.  We saved you a few dollars. How does $175 sound?”  I told him it sounded great and that we’d be by within the hour to pick her up!  When we picked it up, he told me that as long as we have the car, they can fix the exhaust system!

She drives great, no longer sounds like a motorcycle, and Susie says that the exhaust smell we sometimes had in the car is now gone!  So, as they say, all’s well that ends well!  So, I guess it’s not time to say goodbye to the old girl just yet!  Win – Win all around!

Turning Back the Hands of Time

/ Sue and Frank D'Elia / 1 Comment

This recent Memorial Day, Susie and I did something we haven’t done for years. In a very real sense, we Turned Back the Hands of Time! Let me give you a little background….

In August of 1986, Susie, Billy, and I moved to our new (to us) house at 40 Fairfield Avenue in Mineola, NY. About 3 months later, our family of 3 morphed into a family of 5 when Billy’s sister and brother Krissi and Kenny were born. For the next 31 years, we called 40 Fairfield our home and the Village of Mineola the place where we lived. When Billy was in first grade, he along with several of his school friends wanted to join Cub Scouts, so off we went to Cub Pack 246 that met at Mineola’s First Presbyterian Church. Billy’s friend John’s Dad, Andy McInnes, volunteered to be Cubmaster, and as I remembered my great experiences being a Boy Scout, I volunteered to help in anyway I could, and I became the Pack Treasurer. Starting that first year, in May of 1987, Billy and I joined Pack 246 and marched in the Mineola Memorial Day Parade. For the next 28 years, with and/or without our sons Billy and Kenny, I continued to march in that parade…first with Cub Pack 246, and eventually with Mineola’s Boy Scout Troop 45.

Whatever happened on that year’s Memorial Day Weekend, marching in Mineola’s Parade was a given. In the early years, we’d go to see fireworks at Bar Beach in the Town of North Hempstead on Friday night, and then many times head down to the Jersey Shore for Saturday and Sunday, and then head back to Long Island for the parade. Starting in 2005, when we bought the house in Ocean City, NJ our routine changed. Now instead of Fireworks on Friday, we’d head down to Ocean City, and spend the weekend at our house with our Ocean City friends! Some weekends we had kids and their friends with us, and some weekends we were alone, but every year, we’d set an alarm for 5 AM on Monday, throw clothes on, and head up the Garden State Parkway, to Long Island and our parade.

In 1998, our good friend Steve Grosskopf became the Scoutmaster of Troop 45 (I talked him into taking the job), and starting that first May, we gathered at their house and he fed the boys breakfast with the help of his wife Pat and my wife Sue. Eventually the breakfast morphed into an after-parade gathering for the Scouts and the families of the Troop at their house, and we were always there! We’d arrive home about 9 AM, I’d change into my Scout uniform, Susie would get herself ready, and we’d head over to Pat and Steve’s house for the parade. After we all headed off to the start of the parade, Susie and Pat would settle on the house’s front porch, and watch the parade pass by, yelling their support for the Boy Scout contingent!

A much younger Kenny D’Elia marching with the American Flag in a Memorial Day Parade
Steve & his dog Scoutie marching years earlier
Susie & Pat Watching an earlier parade

It was a tradition of long standing, that continued through 2015! Then something changed… I retired from WABC in January of 2016, and now since I was no longer working, there was no reason not to extend our celebration of Memorial Day at the shore. It was very strange for us, that something that had been a part of our family’s life since 1987 was no longer there. It only got stranger when we sold the Mineola house in 2017, and now we really had no connection with the village! We might not have been there for the parade, but it was still a part of me, and every Memorial Day, my Facebook posts were filled with pictures of the Scouts of Troop 45 carrying flags and marching in Mineola’s parade!

So since that first May in 2016, our Memorial Day Weekends have been centered in Ocean City, but we have fondly remembered our time in Mineola, our friends in Troop 45, and years and years of parade participation. For six years that was our MO, but not this year. This year, we grabbed that clock and turned back the hands of time, proving once again that you can go home!

What is different? Well, our friend Steve Grosskopf announced that he was in his last year of being the Scoutmaster of Troop 45. 24 years of work and dedication, and of making Troop 45 one of, if not the best Boy Scout Troop on Long Island, had not been easy, but Steve had done it, and now it was time for him to pass the torch to the next generation. A couple of weeks ago, I got a crazy idea, and one day I shared it with Susie. “You know, we were there for Steve’s first parade, what do you think about being there for his last?” Susie liked the idea, and for the next week or so we batted around the idea. We really wanted to be there for our dear friends Pat and Steve, but wondered if we’d feel out of place and would we know anybody? After all, the last time we’d been there for the parade was 7 years ago in 2015! On Sunday afternoon, I sent him this text message, “Just checking in with you…How are you doing? Are you all set for the parade?” His answer to that text took away any doubt we might have had. “All good thanks! I know this will be my last one, so it is bittersweet. Wish you guys were here having cocktails on the porch.” Game On!

On Sunday we picked out the clothes we were going to wear, made sure our overnight “to go” bag was fully packed, and filled the car with gas. A shower before and an early bed time, and we were ready to go! The alarm woke us at 5:15 Memorial Day morning, and by 6:25 we were backing out of the garage and on our way to the Garden State Parkway! The trip back to Mineola is just under a hundred and 20 miles, and since we were on the road early, traffic was not an issue. The parade was scheduled to start at 11 AM, and we were in great shape time wise. At about 9:15, we rolled down Westbury Avenue, and parked the car around the corner from their house!

Activity was already in full parade mode as we walked up to the house, with Scouts and Adult Leaders gathering flags, and preparing for the after-parade party. As we came around the corner, and walked up to the front of their house, Steve came off the front porch, looked at us, and said, “Oh My God…what are you two doing here?!” We exchanged hugs and told him, “We were here for your first one, no way we were missing your last one!” Mission Accomplished! Pat was equally surprised when she came downstairs, but thrilled that we were going to be there for the day! She insisted that we spend the night, and we gladly agreed.

As the 11 AM hour got near, Steve and the Troop moved over to the parade starting point around the corner, and Susie, Pat, and I settled in on their front porch. Something new for me this year…for the first time since we first marched in 1987, I was going to see the parade, and what better place to see it, than Patrice and Steve Grosskopf’s front porch, a location on which the 4 of us had spent many, many enjoyable hours over the past 20 years they’ve owned the house! Promptly at 11 AM, the parade set off from Mineola’s Wilson Park, rounded the corner of Union Street and Westbury Avenue, and sailed by our front row seats! Lots of memories and lots of folks we recognized from our 31 years in Mineola, and we enjoyed all the groups from the Boy Scouts to the Mineola High School Mustang Marching Band (which all 3 of our kids were members of), and from the Mineola Fire Dept to the Portuguese Dancers and their castanets, and everybody else!

The parade route is 1.8 miles through the village, ending at Mineola’s Memorial Park for a brief service of remembrance and placing of wreaths. Steve was the MC for the event (I wrote his speech), and from all accounts it was a brief but meaningful reminder what the day was all about. Just after 12 noon, the Troop started to arrive back at the Grosskopf’s house for what has become a Troop 45 Tradition over the years, the Troop’s Memorial Day Parade after-party! The men of the Troop immediately went to work grilling hamburgers, hot dogs and bratwurst, while the boys changed out of uniforms and into proper attire for the pool and games. Troop Families showed up, and a great time was had by all!

Susie and I looked at each other several times during the afternoon, and commented about how the 7 intervening years since we’d last been in Mineola for a Memorial Day seemed to melt away, and how easy it was to fall back into old routines. A lot of the people we knew over the years are not still involved, but the folks of Troop 45 are always like family..old or new. We were welcomed back and made to feel at home, and were so glad we were there for Pat and Steve, and Steve’s last Memorial Day as Scoutmaster. All in all, it was a great plan, and worked out perfectly! As TR used to say, “BULLY!!!!”